Redefining success; from looking "good on paper" to doing what truly makes me happy

Photo by Rob Ruben

On paper I had it all. A big job with seemingly endless opportunities ahead of me. A six figure salary and a company car. Wining and dining at some of the best and funkiest restaurants and bars across the city multiple times a week. International business class travel (funded by me, my work wasn’t that glam lol!). A beautiful home filled an ever-increasing number of lovely things in my dream location in the inner norther suburbs of Melbourne.

In reality I was so close to self-combustion. I was working ridiculous hours, spending most of my days navigating politics and in back to back meetings where we never really seemed to resolve anything. I felt like I was always playing someone else’s game. My identity was so caught up in who I was at work, that I couldn’t even fathom that I could be or do anything else. I’d feel guilty for working from home, whether it was to get some much-needed quiet time for strategic work or to (god forbid!) bring some balance back into my life by being home when the plumber came. I was spending sooooo much money on “self care” just to try and counter how poorly I was nourishing my body and soul.

All for what? Someone else’s definition of success? For the perceived security and stability that came with it? For the “luxuries” that life bought me? Hmmmmm….

Today, success looks totally different to me. It’s measured by the amount of days where I get to do my work AND spend time doing things that I love, with the people I love. It’s being able to work from anywhere; be it my home office, coworking at The Space, at the beach, onsite with my clients, poolside in a villa in Bali or in a café in Budapest (yes I’ve done them all!). Having the freedom to work where, how and when I want is priceless to me. It’s about being able to take a day off “just because” and not having to ask anyone for permission to do so! It’s attracting aligned clients who want to make change in the way they work and live. Who want to truly co-create great outcomes for themselves and their clients. It’s about doing work that brings me joy and where I know I’ve made a difference. It’s about the amount of sunsets I get to enjoy and the time I spend outdoors actually soaking it all up. Not the sunrise or sunset that peeks through the office windows of the city office block I was trapped in, that let’s face it I never really even noticed let alone enjoyed.

And ultimately, I’ve discovered that it’s about living my truth and authentically sharing my experiences in the hope it resonates with others and maybe, just maybe inspires them to make change in their life and work. And I’m not necessarily talking big change here…not to start with anyway. I’m talking about taking that first little step that leads you in the direction you know you want to go. 

Because when I took that first step, when I said “I have no idea what I want, but I know I don’t want this” I had no idea what was waiting for me. I had no idea that I would love this life so much. Let’s be honest I didn’t even know if this whole thing was going to work out for me. I just knew that the alternative of staying simply wasn’t an option for me anymore. I knew that something had to change, and that ultimately, I was the only one that could change it. And so I did. 

So, what’s your definition of success? Does it need a little bit of a rejig? Is there something you can do today that will take you one step closer to true, heart opened, living your best life success? We can never have too much support in this journey of finding out what truly makes us happy, so why don’t we do it together? I’d love for you to share your thoughts and plans below. Go on, be brave…what have you got to lose?!